How Porn Attacks Artistic Children


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The swing squeaked slightly as the little girl rocked back and forth. She held a book in her right hand, an erotic romance novel she had found lying about the house. Her other hand tightly held onto the chains of the swing. Little did she know the kind of chain that was winding its way around her young mind. Just a few feet away, some women chatted.

“Isn’t she too young to read that kind of book?” Rory heard one woman ask her friend.
“She probably doesn’t know what it’s about anyway,” the other commented.

 

Rory put her foot down to stop the swing from rocking so she could find her place in the book. “They didn’t know I was addicted to those books. I was only eight years old,” said Rory recalling that moment.

Rory grew up with this secret addiction despite growing up in church. With every page she turned, the weight of guilt grew heavier on her. She knew it was wrong and she wanted desperately to stop. There were times when she thought she’d found her way off of that pendulum of sin, but the mental chains that had wound their way around her on that playground swing held her still. She remained seated, turning pages, caught in a cycle going back and forth with freedom just out of reach.

When she graduated college, her addiction became entwined with her gift for art. As a visual artist, the pornographic words she had read at a very young age didn’t have as much power over her as the images she now explored.  No more turning pages to read words and create images in her mind. On the web she was able to see visuals by the thousands at any time.

“Our greatest passion can easily be warped by the enemy to be our biggest downfall. Art has always been stamped on my DNA, and I am drawn to it, and so porn had a hold on me that way,” she said. Her artistic mind kept craving for a more perfect image, an ultimate presentation of the human body.

As soon as she turned off her laptop, she loathed herself for what she had just done. Guilt and condemnation became her daily companions. “I was so disgusted with myself. I wondered how I had came so far from my one true love…God,” she said. The worst feeling was not being able to talk to God. I had enjoyed prayer ever since childhood, but when I closed my eyes, all I could see was pornographic images,” Rory added.

Rory said she was finally able to quit pornography through pouring out her heart to God in repentance. She realized that she couldn’t get out of it by her own efforts. “After I had truly repented, I experienced God’s grace and freedom, and a feeling of lightness settled on my heart and soul. It banished the voices of condemnation and guilt that had been plaguing me.” Rory said. Through the Holy Spirit’s power and some practical action steps (see below), Rory has been able to keep her distance from the dark playground for eight years now.

Because of her own experience, Rory knows the power media has on the impressionable minds of children. Today’s kids and teens grow up thinking sexual experimentation is normal and that pornography is even part of a healthy relationship.  The average age of exposure to pornography is now 11 years old.

Rory knows that she has been saved for a purpose.  This is why she has devoted her life to the production of creative children’s media products to help shape young minds with God-honoring messages.

She says, “I was saved from my sin and addiction from perverse images so that God could use my gifts to create beautiful images that speak of his grace, mercy, and extravagant love for us. And I have been going down the path of making gospel media ever since then.”

Gutch and Rory

“My honeymoon was not at all like what porn said it would be like. My married love life isn’t like that. It’s better — because it’s real and because I know that it’s how God designed it to be, and it is mine and it is beautiful.”


 

Tips from Rory’s personal experience on battling porn

Because pornography is such a secret poison in the church today, something that many men and women deal with, Rory has shared a few of the things that have helped her to overcome and resist this temptation.

I never assume that I’m “okay.” I know that I have a sleeping monster inside me that I have to guard against myself. When I think I’m strong is when I’m vulnerable to compromise, and to moral failure.

-Lapses happened when I was outside a spiritual community.

-Sometimes my hormonal cycle makes me crave porn. If I feel the urge, I just remember what it felt like to be in my pit of 2007 and remember that I never want to go back to that place.

-Speaking in tongues also helps me. It edifies my spirit and somehow makes it easier for me to resist temptation.

-I realized that when I kept it secret, it led to the same cycle of craving, hiding and feeling ashamed. Talking about my sin helps me a lot. When I talk about my testimony I’m open about my pornography addiction and proudly point to how Jesus has always rescued me from my depravity, hypocrisy, and legalism. Being real about my sin has allowed me become part of other women’s journeys toward freedom against their own lust issues.

-Parents need to be vigilant in protecting their children from the damaging effects of media. My mom covered my eyes when I was a kid, whenever there was a sex scene in a movie. They explained sex to me when I was seven when they saw that I was getting curious, but we did have inappropriate literature lying around the house, romance novels that older relatives would read. So parents need to be really vigilant.

-Thinking about my future husband also helped me. I wanted to bless my husband and fighting my pornography addiction was part of that, I didn’t want to bring those images to my marriage bed with me. Now as a married woman, I am delighted that I had around five years of Jesus renewing my mind, between 2007 and my wedding day in 2013.

Want to talk with Rory directly? You can contact her This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..

 

This story is originally published on emergemissions.org